Monday, October 17, 2005

The darker side of business travel

I remember a day when I aspired to be traveling to many places, seeing many people, and doing important things.

Sometimes the most important thing that could have happened on this 13 day excursion was having Kks talking to me on the phone and hearing that her mother loves me.

I know that some people enjoy business travel. They like the interactions, the excitement of the work on many cultural fronts. I also know that people can get wrapped up in business travel and work because they can't handle what is going on at home. Relationships are hard work, and they can be hard to manage. After a some time in the Northwest, and 4 other corners of the country, I saw all of these things at work--and I got a glimpse of what my life could be. I still don't know what it will be--God and my family and I are working on that one. I had a summer with Kks, and it was a great summer. Sure, it was too hot. But we played and we went places together. We built houses out of legos, ate meals together.

In my aspirations, I wanted to be significant. I wanted to know my gifts matter. How thoughtless of me I would try to look at places other than my wife and daugther. Work can be seductive. I can see how people get sucked in. These past two weeks I have seen glimpses of what business travel can do to a person. It is not evil--but some clear boundaries need to be set. The opportunities to use my gifts will take care of themselves. This is a hard lesson.

When it comes down to it, no one will care about where I have gone for business travel. There are ample opportunities to go places in my life, and they will come at their own time. Kks can come with us, and we can learn together from our perspectives. I don't have to pursue them like they are never going to be there. The opportunities are there through my child's eyes.

Daddy misses you, little girl. I am looking forward to a big hug from my wife.

I'll be home soon.


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